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Conflicted.


This is a post about my recent deep self-examinations, which were prompted by http://www.playtheend.com/game with questions like, “Do you want to live forever?”

Now. I don’t want to go all deep into the meaning of forever and whether or not I think that humans have the will power that must be involved with living forever. We’ll save that for a post that is dying and in desperate need of help.

Like, well, many of my posts up to this point.

BUT.

This post was prompted by a question that occurred to me after thinking for a moment about living forever.

We all die at some point. That’s the natural circle of life. Whether we like it or not, and usually we don’t, we die. My question was: how do I want to be remembered?

And after thinking about that for a while (I won’t bore you with all of the little tedious details of it),  I wanted to write something. So I decided on a blog post. Exciting, isn’t it? -___-

And so, this post isn’t actually about any of that. It’s about my writing. And what kind of writer that I’d like to be.

An author? A script writer? A journalist?

There are so many places that I could go with my writing. I could do magazines, entertainment (although I can’t stand tabloids. They make me shudder in disgust). I could write novels or make movies. There’s so much.

And so I thought for a little while after that about what I wanted to be.

And I figured that, yeah, I could do pretty much anything. I could do any of those, a combination of those. Anything. But I thought most about what I wanted to do.

And maybe that is screenplays. Lately, I’ve found myself drawn to movie scripts. And hey, my Script Frenzy script was actually pretty good. I still have to edit out the random bits and tweak the ending. But it was a proud day, when I finished that. 103 pages of epic.

But maybe it is novels that I like most. I’ve always written stories. But isn’t script writing telling a story, as well?

*shakes head dazedly*

Sigh. I’m going to ponder this for a bit more.

But to be honest, the conclusion that I’ll probably come up with is both. But, I honestly feel the need for a screenplay right about now.

Thinking hard,

Fee(:

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2 comments on “Conflicted.

  1. I think I want to be a short story essayist kinda guy. Novels are too long to hold my attention, and scripts are pretty much the same way. I need something that I can pen down all in one go; the more momentum I have, the better I get.

    • I can only do essays like that. I’ve never, ever been able to do short stories… I always try to give them extensive backgrounds and it’s always like I’m just doing a beginning for a novel. Which is partially what Short Story Sundays are for. To improve that. Which means they won’t be all that great at first.

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